Saturday, April 19, 2008

Can I Splash Too?: Women's Sexual Liberty

So, I was talking with a friend of mine on Yahoo the other day about a woman's sexuality and her right to enjoy it.

"You know, it's great that there are women like you," he said. "Women like you who are sexually adventurous and open about your desires can make a man really happy if he has you. On the other hand, though, if the brother's not strong, then you'll have a problem because he'll be wondering what you're like when he' s not around."

He is not the first guy to tell me that. I have several homies, and they've also echoed this sentiment. They love a freaky woman, but at the same time, if it seems she wants it too much, they wonder how secure they should feel about investing time into a relationship with her. As if her libido would drive her to constant looseness and challenge her capability of handling fidelity. Funny thing is, although not all men have this problem, they themselves don't get down on one another for their high sex drive, actual, perpetrated, or even perceived.

It's amusing because we're women, we all have a clitoris - made exclusively to get us off- and we all have strong nerve endings and sensors in different places as well. Shouldn't that scream, "Hey we like to get f*cked too?" I guess the fact that the female body can be so confusing to maneuver, and the fact that nobody feels responsible for our orgasms... or that we're obligated to have them as well... makes it weird for a man when a woman is so openly in tune with her primal desires, that she just does not care who knows it because she's going for hers anyway. I guess it can be quite off putting in a society where a woman is not supposed to directly desire the art of the fuck... but the sensuality and the "foreplay" around the actual verb. I guess it's the sexual candor that so many men feel should be reserved for them, not the woman in question.

But why is that? Why should it be like that? What type of sense does it make for a woman to look, act, and dress like a seductress and tempt, if she won't enjoy the act itself? Do men honestly think that selfishly of women, that we actually live to serve, and not serve ourselves and be served in the process?

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

they have to feel inferior.

just like a woman can be called a hoe but the man is glorified as a pimp.

smdh.

just do you.

NightFall914 said...

I dont think its about Serving and not being served.Any human should want to feel equally what they give to their partners, but I think if either side male or female shows an excessive(which is realtive to teh individual) sex drive it can be at least fuel for thought and conversation.

How many females have I heard say I got it somewhere else cuz I wasn't getting it at home?So it's an honest question.It not to say that a female should b a nun either.

But at least for me sex is additional to a relationship.Its not an end all be all.So i wish i female would say she aint getting enough from me.lol

Ceecee said...

Wow-this very topic has been on my mind recently...men that I have had conversations with about sex-I can see in their eyes that this is an issue- for a woman to be too open with her sexuality- it makes them wonder- how many men has she bedded and does she do the same thing to each one? Such a double standard!